it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
