My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
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