I'm going to jail i love you
My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Randomize
