Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Randomize
