I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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