Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
Randomize
