I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
Did we literally take a cab across the street
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
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