Dude i fell asleep inside of her
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.