I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Randomize
