with your own penis?
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
Never underestimate the power of titties
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
