dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
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