seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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