I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
