I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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