why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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