he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
