It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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