tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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