My sheets look like a crime scene.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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