Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
Randomize
