I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
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