wat bout pragnant strippers??
your room smells of hookers.
And success
my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize
