I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Randomize