I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
