There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
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