Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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