so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
Randomize