I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
Randomize
