fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Randomize
