wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize