got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize