Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
my poor anus
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
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