everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
Randomize
