SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
