HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
Randomize