Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
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