Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
Randomize
