Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
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