I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
my nose is crying tears of wow.
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
Randomize