Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Randomize
