Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
Randomize
