why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
I'm really busy with my period
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