Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
organizing the empties. That sober.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize
