I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Randomize
