we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
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He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
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We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
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