She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
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