He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
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