Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
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