I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
there is puke in my bra ... again
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