What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
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